By Dale Avery
What are some of your traditions?
It is the time of the year when most family traditions really step up with Thanksgiving just passing and Christmas and New Year’s coming up.
Most of us grew up with our own immediate family traditions, such as having turkey for Thanksgiving and ham for Christmas. Some families open their presents on Christmas Eve, others on Christmas Day. Once you get married, you have to work to blend traditions. Some couples have two Thanksgiving’s and Christmases to see both sides of the family, others alternate holidays or years between in-laws. It can get complicated, stressful and sometimes very emotional for some relatives.
As I have gotten older, I have navigated through all of this as a single guy, a married guy with no kids, a married guy with little kids and now an older married guy with teenagers. Each of these segments in my life has been an interesting journey. Some of the challenges for me have included making sure I made all of the key holidays, spent enough time with family and conformed to each family tradition regarding meals and present opening.
Many years ago I started a different approach to this time of the year. It started when I moved away from home and had to really plan my trips back home with limited vacation days and finances. My thanksgiving tradition changed from hanging with my parents to hanging with friends, then my wife and now our kids. Sometimes we are home and other times we go out of town to a family friendly place like the Wisconsin Dells. My Christmas tradition changed from spending time in the home I grew up in on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, to going to visit my family a few weeks before Christmas. This change allowed my siblings and I to see each other every year and still be home on Christmas Eve or spend time with our in-laws and others.
The key to this holiday season is to not let the traditions manage your holidays and send you on an emotional tailspin but instead, focus on what is really important to you. If you need to take a break from the family, find some time to be quiet and ponder your blessings. It will make your time with family that much more sweet. While some traditions from your childhood may have become drudgery as an adult, consider the impact participating in those traditions has on the younger people around you. Take time to be thankful for your blessings. In this time of seemingly constant tragedy, be patient with older or younger family members that want to see you – we never know when those around us will be snatched from this life. Remember the true meaning of Christmas that a baby came to become man and walk among us and save the world. The family traditions, food, and presents are simply a way to celebrate that gift and our families.
Dale Avery, CPCU, is the assistant vice president – Enterprise Services at State Farm® Corporate Headquarters in Bloomington, Ill.
Avery began his career with State Farm in 1982 as a personal lines underwriter in Lincoln, Nebraska and assumed his current position in 2006. Avery, a native of Missouri, received his bachelor’s degree from Central Missouri State University. He earned his CPCU in 1991.
Dale resides in Bloomington with his wife, Laura and their two daughters; Megan and Jenna.
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